Coffee and an Army of Fangirls
by penguin357
Summary: Before returning Loki to Asgard, Thor decides that his brother needs to try coffee in an internet café. When Loki uses a computer while drinking coffee, it can only lead to one thing: him forming an army of fangirls.


**AN:**

**Disclaimer: I don't own The Avengers.**

**This is a one-shot. It takes place near the end of the actual movie. It's just a random plot cannon **that** I thought of when baking blueberry muffins. R&R!**

"It will just be for a few minutes! My brother must experience the joys of the Midgardian beverage known as coffee!" Thor pleaded.

"Your brother is the Norse God of Lies. Not to mention he is capable of escaping with a few muttered words. If we remove the mouth plate there is no way of telling the damage he could do," Steve replied.

The Avengers were currently waiting for S.H.I.E.L.D. to tell Thor to take Loki to Asgard to answer for his crimes. While waiting, Thor had noticed a coffee shop and instantly remembered the wonderful taste. He then decided that it would be unfair for his brother not to be able to try it.

"I don't see what the problem is," Tony cut in. "It's just an internet café. And if he does decide to cause trouble we'll reacquaint him with the giant, green rage monster."

At this Steve gave in. "I suppose he could try it if you really want him too. We'll be guarding the perimeter if anything happens."

"Thank you friends!" Thor smiled.

With permission given to him he removed Loki's mouth plate and led them both to the café. When the walked up to the counter they were greeted by a shocked cashier.

"W-what may I g-get you two?" she stuttered, eyeing them both fearfully.

"I would like two coffees," Thor answered. He then paid her and sat down at a table with Loki. A few minutes later she returned with the drinks and handing them to the Asgardians. She then quickly turned around and left.

They sat there in awkward silence drinking the coffee until Loki spoke up. "I know you often do not make the best decisions, but letting me be able to move my mouth simply so that I can try your favorite drink has to top all of your idiotic decisions."

"I simply thought it would only be fair for us both to experience at least a few of the many wonders Midgard has to offer," Thor responded. "You should also try the screens of light they call computers. They are simply magnificent!"

"Then I will," Loki replied. He then walked away from Thor and sat at one of the computers thinking about what he should do.

After thinking for a while, he came to the decision of looking up what coffee really was. He would never tell Thor, but the drink truly was delectable.

When the page pulled up he discovered where it was first made and the interesting effects it had on the mortals. According to the website it could help keep them awake.

"_But what would they stay awake for?" _he wondered to himself. This thought led to him looking up activities that kept mortals awake for a large extent of time. He was familiar with all of the terms except for _fangirling_. Yet again, his curiosity led him to looking up what the Midgardian term meant.

The definition was: Fangirling- (v.) 1. the reaction a fangirl has to any mention or sighting of the object of her "affection". These reactions include shortness of breath, fainting, highpitched noises, shaking, fierce head shaking as if in the midst of a seizure, endless blog posts, etc. 2. a gathering of two or more fangirls in which they proceed to waste endless amounts of time ogling, discussing/arguing, stalking, etc. the object of their "affection"

From what he could gather, there were many of these "fangirls" on Midgard and they would follow anyone of interest. He suddenly had a brilliant thought.

_Why couldn't he have his own group of fangirls? They would rally behind him when he told them to due to their affection for him. Together they would form a new personal army for him._

Loki quickly went to the mortal website of Tumblr where he made an account. He put up a picture of himself with the phrase "kneel before me." Within minutes, he had hundreds of followers. He then sat back proud of his work.

In the middle of basking in his own glory, Thor came up to him. "Brother, we must leave. It is time to return to Asgard."

Loki let his brother take him back to their previous location. The mouth plate was put back on his face, effectively hiding his smile.

As Thor grasped his arm Loki lost himself in his own thoughts.

_They can take me away from Midgard for now, but thanks to my brother's stupid kindness and coffee, I will be able to conquer this world when I return. For when I do, I will have an ARMY OF FANGIRLS!_

**AN: This is by far the most random thing I've ever written. For those of you reading ****A True Team****, a new chapter will be up later today or tomorrow. Thanks for reading!**


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